There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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