I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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