So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
