DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
