D3 body, D1 cock
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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