He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
