I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
