i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
