Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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