Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Randomize
