Pappa wants mamma naked
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
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