You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
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Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
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I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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