All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
