lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
