What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
