Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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