Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
i think my cat just said my name.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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