party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
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