apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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