Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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