On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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