I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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