i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
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I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
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And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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