For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
