Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize