So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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