shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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