Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
