My brain says no but my pants say off.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
