do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
