I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
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