Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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