Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
