Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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