actually, I'm a sock model
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
