I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
