I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
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she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
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as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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