My liver just broke up with me...
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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