I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
