Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
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He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
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I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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