Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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