He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
areolas are like halos for boobs.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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