I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize