Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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