Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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