I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize