Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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