I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
God, I missed his penis.
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