so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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