We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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