Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
smell my finger.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
